As I was trying my level best to avoid inhaling the toxic odour of peroxide while I was getting my hair coloured at the saloon, a catchy advert displayed on one of the saloon's walls caught my attention. It was an ad for a hair-colouring range that read: 'Model. Me' ™ and for some odd reason I pictured myself modelling as per the ™ rules. It helped me sit through the agony of waiting for the hair colouring session to end.
The ™ rules set my mind thinking. In my opinion such words are supposed to be independent, free, unlimited for usage, available at no cost, and unconstrained in ownership.
Sitting and waiting impatiently for my greys to hurriedly get soaked in as much possible the poisonous peroxide, the ™ fact actually made me wonder as to who really holds ownership to language. Who gives us the right to own such language?
I once recall reading (I have too many greys as you have figured to remember where) that advertising, especially in today's age, is made of 99 per cent perspiration and 1 per cent inspiration. You sure do not need to perspire a drop when putting a ™ at the end of a sentence. Just put together a few simple words and restrict their usage by shackling them with the ™. The trademark means that if someone dares to end the siege around the use of these words, well - they will end up with a lawsuit slapped against them.
Endless
Look around you and you will understand what I am talking about. (And I shall try as much as I could to avoid naming any brands in fear that the newspaper or myself be held liable!). The list is truly endless. Take for instance: 'i'm lovin' it'™, 'like. no. other'™, 'Happy Meal'™, 'make every drop count'™, 'Just Do It'™, 'Made With Pass!on'™, 'Share Moments. Share Life'™.
Useful campaigns could easily be built around this abundance of vocabulary. For a fight against drug addiction, especially among the young, a Just Don't Do It™ campaign would do, or an I'm Hatin It™ exercise campaign for those who really hate being on the move. Funkie Meal™ could add a little flavour because it's Thumb Lickin' Wow™, and Make Every Frock Count™ would bring in the colours.
So who gave us the right that some words be 'enslaved' of usage and certain words 'barred' from being actively present?
Once a relative of mine sent me a bottle of oil, which had my first name imprinted on the label. I do not know how good that oil was or its value on the shelf. It did not actually matter. What mattered was that my name was printed on it - it sure looked (to me at least) absolutely fantastic and unquestionably beautiful.
I was in a mood of full and unequivocal admiration as I checked out the bottle, turning and flipping it from all sides. I just was in awe. So much so that I banned any use of that oil in any cooking in the house for a full period of two weeks.
After I got over this obsessive affair, anger took over my emotions. I thought to myself - how could my name be used for a product. It surely is my name and hence, I have a right to it. Who could argue against me if I in fact, use my name alongside my favourite ™ icon. Why not.
Imagine, there could be the following: Najla's Yummy Tummy Cookies™, Najla's De-Stress Kit™ (with three versions for the office, home, or travel), Clean Me Nappies™, Mission Possible Dirt-Free Detergent™, Ticky Tick-Tok Watches™ (handmade and with Chinese and Swiss models), Wake Up & Gulp the Coffee Mugs™, Drink the Milk & Sleep Off Glasses™, SalikMe Car Air Freshener™, My Shawarma™, Me My Rigaag & Falafel™.
As long as the ™ is guarding my inventive list, not a single soul could stand to argue that I do not own that language.
So who really owns language? Well, lets leave it for ™ to decide on that.
