The modern-day mantra of sparing the rod and spoiling the child is undergoing a rethink in the 21st century with some parents admitting to opting for corporal punishment as a last resort when every other means of chastisement has failed.
There is understandably a measure of guilt attached to this admission as parents grapple with the repercussions of their decision on the psychological make-up of their wards. They analyse their actions and try to justify taking this extreme measure during a process of soul searching.
After the act, there is the horrific thought that one is a terrible parent for taking the easy way out, administering smacks instead of lending a sympathetic ear.
TV programmes such as House of Tiny Tearaways try to address this problem. Parents are told by the child psychologist how intimidating adults can seem to a tot and the importance of coming down to a child's level to reprimand or speak firmly to them regarding unsuitable behaviour.
One can see the good sense in all this advice but one must also take into account the stressful lifestyle of modern-day nuclear households with most parents holding on to jobs as well as trying their best to run a house and bring up children.
So, to expect unlimited patience when dealing with wayward children is perhaps a little too much to ask. Child experts speak of the irreparable damage wrought on a child's psyche by physical chastisement.
But at the other end of the spectrum of behaviour correction are methods which while not physically retributive in nature can be equally injurious to a child's sense of self-worth.
These include cold shouldering children, ignoring them or isolating them in their room. Or speaking to them in such icy tones or so disparagingly that one can almost feel the temperature drop.
No serious harm
Having experienced physical punishment as a child I honestly feel that the occasional smack does no serious harm. I don't consider myself traumatised and as an adult I can also see that many times the smacking was certainly justified after what can only be called provocative behaviour.
However, I am aware that if any of my siblings were to read this piece, I would never hear the end of it. They bitterly recall the past when they seemed to get beaten for almost any infraction of house rules while I, being the youngest, seemed to get away with behaviour which wouldn't have been condoned if exhibited by any of them.
When I try to justify my parents' blind spot by suggesting that perhaps it might be because I toed the parental line more easily without making a big issue out of obedience to rules which they might have considered draconian, I am met with cries of indignation.
They counter my argument with examples of similar behaviour from me or one of them and the very different response it met from the parents. I am told I am completely spoilt and have never known any sorrow while their burden of woes is so heavy that they still stagger under its weight. Eventually I am made to feel guilty for having received such few spankings compared to them.
The very fact that I can remember exactly how many times I have been physically chastised is ample proof of this favouritism. As for them, they have lost count of their physical punishments. In fact, they insist that they lived on a daily diet of this while I was completely oblivious to their painful experiences.
After making me out to be an ogre and the parents a set of hard-hearted villains that would make Cruella of filmdom fame seem benign, they almost make me wish that I had been taken to task more frequently. The guilt of exclusion is almost too much to bear. In fact, the thought that I escaped this form of punishment while they had to put up with it all the time almost makes me wish I had had more of it, not less.
